Caroline Kennedy Calls An Audible

With her bid to win an appointment to the Senate floundering in the wake of her erratic performance in interviews over the weekend, Caroline Kennedy said today that she has contacted New York Jets owner Woody Johnson to express her interest in the now-vacant head coaching job.

When asked about her qualifications for the position, Ms. Kennedy noted that Uncle Ted played on the Harvard varsity squad in the 50's, and added that she watched the 1998 AFC Championship game and has read Joe Namath's autobiography. Regarding the Jets' collapse and what she would do to set things right, she said, "Well, you know, we’ve been watching the team that Mr. Johnson has put together and, you know, then there was a vacancy here, you know, just like everybody else, you know, who's going to fill it, isn't that interesting, there's a lot of great candidates, you know, I figure, why not try, I really think I have something to offer." When pressed for more specifics on how she would turn the team around, she added, "Well, you know, just, um, rah rah rah, move that ball, you know."

She declined to address her feelings on Brett Favre, but a spokesperson, in an email, wrote: "Caroline was fully supportive of the decision to sign Brett Favre. But now that he finished the season so poorly, she thinks it was a bad idea."

Ms. Kennedy embarked on a tour of sports bars around the city to introduce herself to the fans. She was outfitted in full pads and a helmet in order to ward off those annoying reporters.